One of my favourite treats has become gummi candy, specifically the gummi blue and white sharks.  Sharks are not blue and white and the idea that they should be a candy item is a strange one.  However, they are delicious and I eat them in a misguided attempt to help my cravings for sweets.  I rationalize their consumption because if I am eating a gummi shark, then I am not eating chocolate which is my other weakness.

The sharks are made from corn syrup, fructose, glucose, in that order.  Other non-food ingredients follow.  Still I buy them and consume them.  It is mixed gummi treat container.  There are sharks, worms, coke bottles, Swedish berries and strawberries. I try to choose the one that has the maximum number of sharks in it.  I start with them and then the berries; followed by the coke bottles.  The worms are left to the very end, it may take several weeks to eat them.  I do not like the worms which is irrational since they are made from the same ingredients.  Still, the sharks are always the first to go.

Success today!  I fixed my vacuum cleaner and it works.  After putting it back together, it still did not pick up dirt.  I considered the situation and took it apart again.  The hose was clear, I had removed the blockage, a disgusting concoction of cat hair, lint and unidentifiable flotsam. 

So something else was wrong.  It had to be the fan belt.  So I disassembled it one more time.  The belt had indeed slipped off the rod.  I wrestled it back into place.  Plugged it back in and it worked.  Cat hair was cleaned up, my rugs look great again.  I was so happy that I cleaned the carpets three times.  I picked up enough cat hair to make a sweater.  

Now I can relax with a cup of tea and a Zero bar (dark chocolate) and enjoy the cleanliness of my living room.  I feel good. Something tangible was accomplished today.

Vacuum Cleaners

I have carpeting everywhere in my house.  So I use my vacuum quite often.  Recently, I noticed that it was not working well, the dust and cat hair was not disappearing the way that it should.  I checked out the hose and it was solidly plugged with cat hair and everything that had been on my carpets.

So I took the vacuum cleaner apart and unplugged the obstruction.  It was a mass of fur, shredded papers and general rug detritus. Unfortunately, I did not pay  enough attention to where everything goes when it must be re-assembled.  So my vacuum cleaner sits in pieces on my kitchen floor.

I know that I can put everything back into its proper place.  But, my eyesight is not great and so I must do it during the day when the light is at is best and I am not tired from working all day. 

In the meantime, the fur balls multiply and I try not to step on the many small screws that are scattered over my floor.

There is a lesson to be learned somewhere here.

Then the Elephant Showed Up....

Years ago, my daughter had a summer job working for the city's animal control.  She sat in an office and took phone calls; usually complaints about barking dogs, loose dogs, bad dogs etc.  One day she got a call complaining about an elephant.  The caller was concerned that the elephant was being exploited.  A bylaw officer went to investigate and did not find an elephant.  The next day the caller reported the reappearance of the elephant.  Again, the officer could not find any sign of it.

The next day the caller called back, the elephant had returned.  This time the officer was able to actually see the elephant.  It had been brought in for a store promotion.  It turned out that there was no specific bylaw against elephants being on display in our city.  

So the store owner could not be fined or ticketed. The elephant  was eventually returned to where ever it came from.

So now, I say to people, "and then the elephant showed up'. I mean that something happens that we do not expect.  We see it and cannot accept it. It is not necessarily against the law.  But it is here and unavoidable.  That is life. 

Just Another Coffee..

Today when I was driving to work, I was stopped at an intersection.  This particular intersection is popular with panhandling homeless people.  The light is long and there is enough time to go up and down the row of cars with a hand out to collect money.

I noticed a young girl.  Her back was too me, she looked about 16 years old.  Then she turned around. She was an Aboriginal woman, her hair was braided and her face was bruised.  She had a bandaid on one cheek.  I reached into my purse and pulled out a toonie.  I rolled down my window and put it into her cup.  She said thank you and went on to the next car. 

The toonie was meaningless to me.  It was a cup of coffee and I had more money.  Perhaps the money that this woman made today would be enough to keep her from spreading her legs for one night.  Perhaps not.  The addictions that she must have been suffering are severe and consuming. Otherwise, why panhandle for change from strangers who look down at you as worthless?

The people in the car immediately behind me ignored her.  The third car gave her money.  Perhaps its was all meaningless.  Perhaps, I did not help her at all.  But I like to think that my money made enough of a difference that she was able to stay straight for a day.  Get a meal.  Make a phone call.  Have a safe night's sleep.  Take the first step in getting back to a safe and sane place.  A place where you do not have stand at the side of the highway with your hand out.

Menopause Approaches...

Today I saw my Dr. and she thinks that all of my symptoms and craziness can be explained by menopause.  I am in the right age range and apparently menopause can cause the feelings that I have been having.  God, I hope that the answer is that simple.

My memory loss could be related to this and thus be temporary.  It is very scary not being able to remember simple things.  Or important things that I want to remember.  I feel very tentative.

Today, I will take a different perspective and show some of my poetry.  These are two of my older poems and they are my favourites.

My Kitchen Buddha

All serene all watching all smiling

Sitting on his shelf he watches

The rice burns

The kettle boils

The dirty dishes

The milk spoils

The cats quarrel

The oranges shrivel

All serene, all seeing all knowing

Mourning Doves

Rain slips down the green shimmering trees

Grey mourning doves endure the the showers

Dreaming of yellow sun-washed days

With soft murmurs, they wait for blue skies

I learned to appreciate poetry when I took a class in my 1st year of University